fond memory

As years passed by, we grow and laugh and smile and cry and fond with each other. How long will we be together?

As what had the God said, that happiness only comes awhile and so do sadness will stay not forever.

And if we know that these moment don't stay for eternity. Why do we still not be with each other when we know the truth? We don't have much time with each other now.

Aiming forever, seems to be impossible for anyone to achieve. But at least we had the memories that bond all of us together.

Every time that I'm not happy. I think and think, what could have I done, and what I had understand for this long.

Whether I really understand what God had taught me. How should I bring myself into this world. What's the role I should be in this sinful world. I pray to you, and I know you supply me with all the power and bless me without leaving anything to yourself.

I seek refuge from you, for facing whatever come to me every single minute and second within my life.

Every now and then, someone stop walking side by side with me. They went to find you, my lord. Had you seen them walking with you? Please let me know that I misses them very much.

I learned that when they leave me, I shouldn't be worry nor sad as they will always be with you. They will always be with you, as if you were be with me. I know they are still be me, although it's not physically, but spiritually, it's.

Life still need to go on, even if they were not with me. Some others that might left me, whom will go to others place to do something for someone. But I will never forget who you're that had been with me all along this time.

Thank you for everything

Who you are mirrored you family.

Who you are mirrored you family.
Everything you did, everything you reflect yourself upon,
I saw many example before, that who they are,
reflect upon their family.

It's their home, their family who brought them to be someone else.
and to shape them into someone else.
If someone is stubborn, we can know that someone from their family were stubborn too.
Thus, they learned it and show it to others.

What qualities one had, will reflect what qualities did your family had.
If you're lazy, and this will be applied to your family that they are lazy too...
Therefore it's very important for us to behave and think carefully for the sake of our family members.

I seen too many human being, who had those fine qualities within themselves.
Their family members are just as fine as them.
While those who own a bad qualities,
Their family members are just as bad as them.

If you love your family, Please love yourself..

Some pictures on Hatyai, Thailand trip

One of my favorite Hakka song

walking through the valley of vain,
no one seems to be visible
through my eye..

where is everyone?
I go through the streets of timeless,
and I reached here..
everyone's freezing and not moving..
What happened?
can anyone tell me?

time seems like be really cruel,
where it took my life away..
it took my friends away,
it took my grandparents away,
it took my youth away,
it took my everything away,
but only one thing that it will leave behind.
Memories.

Living on a summer day,
where I woke up in a love day.

There's some birds singing,
while the rainbow shines.
It's not always,
but that's someway.
That the world, will favor you.
In a way...

Who can be control of their own destiny?
And some said they can.
while some others said they can't.
What is the fact of this truth?
No one knows it but you.
You're your own decision maker,
You make things happened.
Other than that, let the God decide it for you.

Living in the shadow of the mighty one,
we plea to him, and hopefully they will guide us
throughout our day and night,
making us a better living being
with a soul of kindness and not fallen being,
who condemned the world from being
a celestial heaven on earth.

Human being,
are family from one mother and one father,
but why are they hurting each other?
doing sinful things
o God, did you closed you eye
and gave up hope on us?
Please make all of us a better being.
News about those devilish act.
what could I do to make it a better place?

God, please hear my plea...
destroy those fallen one and leave peace on mother earth.

18/8/2010

Early in the morning, I woke up at 6.57am but before the alarm could wake me up, My body alarm already wake me up at 6.56am and it's normal for me to experience these phenomena. I would turn around on my bed, twisting and turning really make me feel good in the morning.

Second thing would be texting someone who I cared about and walk towards wooden door and take a long deep breathe before carrying my Ipod into the loo and read on some news on Thestar, of course brushing my teeth and taking a bath which steamed up my day.

Once coming out from the bathroom, it's 7.15am which means 5 minutes before Potek will come over. So, turning myself into formal suit man while refilling my water tumbler. At 7.20am, he's already outside my house, calling me out and telling me that he would go to the college first. After he went off, I continued to get myself ready and ride towards the market to get some breakfast.

When I reached the market, monk wasnt there yet and so I walk into the market to seek for some food. I noticed that not much option for me to choose and at least I bought 2 yam cake, a yam puff, an egg tart and 5 sushi roll 'dim sum'. Before going off, I gave some food to the monk and chit-chatted with Ah Tee for 5 minutes and he told me that he will be leaving to Thailand today instead of tomorrow as what he had scheduled.

Nothing much happened during the way to college, just that the sky's clear and wonderful. I noticed that the sky within the few days are so pleasurable.

Upon reaching the college after I parked my bike. I was so bored to carry my heavy bag to climb three stories high just to reach my classroom. Nothing much happened than one of my classmate is sweeping the floor and throwing rubbish into the big black rubbish bin.

Phew, the goes my burden on my shoulder after I put away my huge bag and started to take out my breakfast and chew them hard! 1 dim sum + a piece of yam cake before Mdm Usha came into the class. Poor NPL had to carry heavy laptop and other bags too...

Presentation seems to be bored but discussion had stimulated most of my friends in the class where they started to defend themselves and ended up being wonderful without much argument between both parties. Well, I felt my presentation was a failure though, but who cares? haha~

Recess time where I had continued my second round of breakfast where NPL bought me a pack of fried rice, a pack of nasi lemak plus some banana cekodok. NICEEEEEE ~ *eat eat eat* *fat fat fat*

After eating, I was wondering around the class, lurking at each of every corner lending others my Ipod and playing along with them. Oh yeah, yongrin, lao koid and ah yow + me are having fun with the ANGRY BIRD application on my Ipod. Another of my concern will be changing Thai currency as I will be going to Hatyai next Friday! Hurray!

11.30am, Mr. Lau entered class and asked if we had any question on the research. I cleared my doubt on my research paper by asking him some of the detail and after that I head on to the library to settle my action research (interview transcription). I saw so many of my classmates photocopying... and what am I doing?

yong rin told me that he had not do any of his work and so do I. We chit chat around while waited for the time to get passed. I asked tai lou to come over too after noticing him while he was walking around. I asked him whether he will go for lunch and he said in 5 minutes time. Thus, I informed NPL that I'm going for my lunch.

My class ended at 1.30pm, but we rushed out before that and the guard let us go... Phewwww...

My lunch was the same again- Chicken rice. I tried to cut down my food intake by not ordering extra rice. Nothing much happened during that time but we discussed about the currency AGAIN. Oh, the drink I took was double apple juice. However, I don't feel like it's double.

After reached college after my lunch, I treated myself a stick of Choki-choki on the way walking to computer lab. Well, I do felt that the computer lab had NO QC at all. When will my college ever upgrade the internal structure than the external one? Seems like it will not happened in 20 years time.

I hate myself during this hour for being a emo bastard and hurt someone. Shame on you. Unit planning and everything seems so confusing and I do think that it's kind of bullshit to do this thing which MIGHT NOT BE related to my future undertaking.

Time to go back where I took my bath and said sorry to NPL for being a rude idiot and started to write this passage but when I written half way, I dozed off and wake up at nearly 7pm which I had a dinner with my colleagues in QE2 at Penang Island. I took my bath and get prepared.
My attire? Everything in white where I wore my new white trousers.

During the journey, I was amazed by the road where there are so little cars and other vehicles as they had their fasting period.
We uses ferry service to go over the Island which cost us RM7.70 and about 17 minutes to reach. Upon reaching QE2, we went to the wrong place at first before we reached the correct sides with all my colleagues waiting for us.

I was impressed by the design of the restaurant but soon after I read the menu, I was stunned by the price which was not quite acceptable for me. I chose Chicken Martini which cost RM42.00 while NPL chose some classical pasta at RM18.00-ish. We waited for so long before the dishes reached. Oh yeah, Birthday girl get a bunch of flower from her BF..

About the food.. 5/10 for me, while environment will be 8.5/10. After that? Hardcore photographing session while chit chatting with my colleague again. wei jin told me he wished to have a ship that can accumulate 10+ people on the deck and i told him that how about few hundred people on the deck enjoying. He was in shock and told me, SIAO AH.. and I told him, the ferry :D and lots more of stories going around.

12 midnight, all of us went back home and I followed Kaisheng's car to go home. It's raining while going back home. Once I reached home, I phoned my Mummy who had missed call me. She told me that she had came from cruise and enjoyed herself while Daddy too. Then I msn with NPL and bathed. At last, continue this dairy till now.. 2.15am.. good nite raymond!

People will change,
from one to no one,
from no one to one,
from two to one,
from one to two...

who will be the one,
and who will be the two?
family will be the one,
then who will be the two?

it's all about numbers,
or it's all about truth?
only you're the one who knew it,
no one but you.

you're who you're.
and be who you want to be.
fly to where you want,
and be there and you will see.

sensing nothing from everything,
seems to be everything to evading.
making something from everything.
and suffering everything from nothing.

being something or someone,
is something or nothing,
living in the candle of light,
heading towards the holy light,
lighting yourself for others,
being forgotten after someday.
as candle, will be thrown,
after being used..
and will be forget.

it's a noble job,
where you rise and death.
for the next candle you may said.
or others than a candle mate.
death is nothing but life.
and life is about death.

we go and wait for another day,
we rise in wonderful day.
and we shall gone like a thunder day,
and we rise in a cloudy day.

Anything that I can said,
Nothing which I wouldn't said,
Never said which I couldn't said.

And this is what I could say,
Needed Love for one..
Nerdy silly little lady..

Around the corner of the letter,
Never think of what others said,
Name him as someone, but will he honor you?

And this is what one should think...
Near the soul of each others...
Never ending or Never Start..

Think and Ponder...

Why and how,
those stones can be there together.
is it fate that bring them together,
or they are forced to?

are we being those stones too?
are we forced to be in a group,
or are we here without any force?
Yes or No... well, I don't know.
That's just life.

Do what we could and try what we could.
being someone who I don't want to be.
when only others can be reached.
are those what we are trying to do?

潮州话 Teochew dialect

I was into learning some Teochew dialect recently, therefore I searched through the net and find some interesting thing to share.

"Due to geographical isolation from Fujian and influences from Cantonese and the later Hakka, Teochew evolved into a separate language."

Teochew is a member of the Southern Min group in Sino-Tibetan family. It is a dialect spoken in the Chaoshan area, in southeastern Guangdong


and some information from wikipedia

Languages in contact

This refers to Chaozhou, which is the variety of Teochew spoken in the People's Republic of China.

Putonghua

Chaozhou children are introduced to Putonghua as early as in kindergarten; however, Chaozhou remains the primary medium of instruction. In the early years of primary education, Putonghua then becomes the sole language of instruction, although students typically continue to talk one another in Chaozhou. Putonghua is widely understood, however minimally, by most younger Chaozhou speakers, but the elderly usually do not speak Putonghua since, in their times, teaching was done in the local vernacular.

Chaozhou accent in Putonghua

Native Chaozhou speakers find the neutral tone in Putonghua hardest to master. Chaozhou has lost the alveolar nasal ending [-n] and so the people often replace the sound in Putonghua with the velar nasal [-ŋ]. None of the southern Min dialects has a front rounded vowel, therefore a typical Chaozhou accent supplants the unrounded counterpart [i] for [y]. Chaozhou, like its ancient ancestor, lacks labio-dentals; people therefore substitute [h] or [hu] for [f] when they speak Putonghua. Chaozhou does not have any of the retroflex consonants in the northern dialects, so they say [ts], [tsʰ], [s], and [z] instead of [tʂ], [tʂʰ], [ʂ] and [ʐ].

Hakka

Since Chao'an, Raoping and Jieyang border the Hakka-speaking region in the north, some people in these regions speak Hakka, though they can usually speak Chaozhou as well. Chaozhou people have historically had a great deal of contact with the Hakka people, but, interestingly, the Hakka language has had little, if any, influence on Chaozhou. Similarly, in Dabu and Fengshun, where the Chaozhou- and Hakka-speaking regions meet, Chaozhou is also spoken although Hakka remains the primary language there.

Cantonese

Because of influences from Hong Kong soap operas and Guangdong provincial tele programmes, many young Chaoshan people can understand quite a lot of Standard Cantonese even if they cannot speak it.

Other languages

In the mountainous area of Fenghuang (鳳凰/凤凰), a non-Sinitic language, the She language, is spoken by a few hundred aboriginal She people (畲). It belongs to the Hmong-Mien language family.

Pronouns

[edit] Personal pronouns

The personal pronouns in Teochew, like in other Sinitic languages, do not show case marking, therefore 我 [ua] means both I and me and 伊人 [i naŋ] means they and them. The southern Min dialects, like some northern dialects, have a distinction between an inclusive and exclusive we, meaning that when the addressee is being included, the inclusive pronoun 俺 [naŋ] would be used, otherwise 阮 [ŋ]. No other southern Chinese language, such as Cantonese or Hakka, has this distinction.

Personal Pronouns in Teochew

	Singular		Plural
1st person	我 ua2	I / me	Inclusive	俺 naŋ2	we / us
			Exclusive	阮 ŋ2	we / us
2nd person	汝 lɤ2	thou / thee	恁 niŋ2		you (all)
3rd person	伊 i1	he/she/it/him/her	伊人 i1 naŋ5		they/them

[edit] Possessive pronouns

The Teochew language does not distinguish the possessive pronouns from the possessive adjectives. As a general rule, the possessive pronouns or adjectives are formed by adding the genitive or possessive marker 個/个 [kai7] to their respective personal pronouns, as summarised below:

Possessive Pronouns in Teochew

	Singular		Plural
1st person	我個/我个 ua2 kai7	my / mine	Inclusive	俺個/俺个 naŋ2 kai7	our / ours
			Exclusive	阮個/阮个 ŋ2 kai7	ours / ours
2nd person	汝個/汝个 lɤ2 kai7	thine /	恁個/恁个 niŋ2 kai7		your / yours
3rd person	伊個/伊个 i1 kai7	his / his; her / hers; its / its	伊人個/伊人个 i1 naŋ5 kai7		their / theirs

本書是我個/本书是我个 [puŋ2 tsɤ1 si6 ua2 kai7] The book is mine.

However, there are instances in which 個/个 [kai7] can be dropped, such as when followed by a measure word, as in:

我條裙/我条裙 [ua2 tiou5 kuŋ5] my skirt

[edit] Demonstrative pronouns

Teochew has the typical two-way distinction between the demonstratives, namely the proximals and the distals, as summarised in the following chart:

The Teochew Demonstratives

		Proximal		Distal
General	Singular	只個 [tsi2 kai7]	this	許個 [hɤ2 kai7]	that
	Plural	只撮 [tsi2 tsʰoʔ4]	these	許撮 [hɤ2 tsʰoʔ4]	those
Spatial		只塊 [tsi2 ko3]	here	許塊 [hɤ2 ko3]	there
		只內 [tsi2 lai6]	inside	許內 [hɤ2 lai6]	inside
		只口 [tsi2 kʰao7]	outside	許口 [hɤ2 kʰao7]	outside
Temporal		只陣 / 當 [tsi2 tsuŋ5 / tɤŋ3]	now; recently	許陣 / 當 [hɤ2 tsuŋ5 / tɤŋ3]	then
Adverbial		這生 [tse2 sẽ1]	like this	向生 [hia2 sẽ1]	like that
Degree		醬 [tsĩẽ3]	this	向 [hĩẽ3]	that
Type		者個 [tsia2 kai7]	this kind	向個 [hia2 kai7]	that kind

[edit] Interrogative pronouns

The Teochew Interrogative Pronouns

who / whom		(底)珍 [ti tieŋ]
		底人 [ti naŋ]
what		乜個 [miʔ kai]
what (kind of) + noun		乜 + N [miʔ]
which		底 + NUM + CL + (N) [ti]
		底個 [ti kai]
where		底塊 [ti ko]
when		珍時 [tieŋ si]
how	manner	做呢 [tso ni]
	state	在些(樣) [tsai sẽ ĩẽ]
		乜些樣 [miʔ sẽ ĩẽ]
		什乜樣 [si miʔ ĩẽ]
how many		幾 + CL + N [kui]
		若多 + (CL) + (N) [dzieʔ tsoi]
how much		若多 [dzieʔ tsoi]
why		做呢 [tso ni]

[edit] Numerals

Teochew numeral system

Pronunciation	Financial	Normal	Value	Notes
liŋ5	零	〇	0	〇 is an informal way to represent zero, but 零 is more commonly used, especially in schools. also 空 [kang3]
tsek8	壹	一	1	also 蜀 [tsek8] (original character) also 弌 (obsolete) also [ik4] as the last digit of a 2-or-more-digit number e.g. 二十一 [dzi6 tsap8 ik4] or days of a month e.g. 一號 [ik4 ho7] or as an ordinal number e.g. 第一 [tõĩ6 ik4] also 么(T) or 幺(S) [iou1] when used in phone numbers etc.
no6	兩(T) or 两(S)	二	2	also 弍 (obsolete) also 貳(T) or 贰(S) also [dzi6] as the last digit of a 2-or-more-digit number e.g. 三十二 [sã1 tsap8 dzi6] or days of a month e.g. 二號 [dzi6 ho7] or as an ordinal number e.g. 第二 [tõĩ6 dzi6].
sã1	叄(T) or 叁(S)	三	3	also 弎 (obsolete) also 參(T) or 参(S) [sã1].
si3	肆	四	4
ŋou6	伍	五	5
lak8	陸	六	6
tsʰik4	柒	七	7
poiʔ4	捌	八	8
kao2	玖	九	9
tsap8	拾	十	10	Although some people use 什, It is not acceptable because it can be written over into 伍.

Note: (T): Traditional characters; (S): Simplified characters.

Ordinal numbers are formed by adding 第 [tõĩ6] in front of a cardinal number.

Life is unpredictable,
when you're having good dream all day long,
there will be always a nightmare followby.

when something bad had gone,
there will be always another badass coming back.
because there will no such thing as 100% good nor 100% bad.

and i'm such a foolish person,
who tried to break the law,
by creating 100% positive energy within a sphere.
i'm just too innocent..

everyone wants to have their wonderful life,
having their family hugging together,
enjoying their life and appreciating one and another.
and making me starts to wonder,
how is this possible and why is this impossible?

he's just like a hamburger meat,
being cover by multiple layer of breads, cheeses and others...
on top and below of it.
the burger will never be a burger if any ingredient missed from where it supposed to be.

just like a family,
a family will never be a family if any of the family members missing due to some reason.

being someone who i want to be,
and how i wish what i wished had come to be.
the feeling are bad and funny.
and how i wish that's not a reality.

life is funny,
everything seems so cheesy,
and seems so tricky.

problems we faced might be challenge,
but the more challenge we undergo,
the stronger we're,
and the more understand we have.

arguement is nothing but an oil,
where nothing can be done but anger raging quicker,
burning the oil like wild fire,
fire can be put off,
by the correct way and how it should done,
time might be water, but it will never helps to put off the fire.
sand, its sand that can be done.

it's depend on the one who choose how to put off the fire,
whether will the fire to clear off or done.

Pictures bring tons of memories...
From age to everything.
The more I see,
The more I ponder,
The more I wonder,
Everything will remain as memories.

The time we spent together...
Sometimes, it's harsh and full of thorns.
but I realize that, without those thorns...
we won't be able to remember each other well.

Sometimes life is unbearable.
yet I still endure, as I know..
I'm no longer who I'm years ago.
The changes within myself.
It's just so special but not as special as what I thought.

Time really go away so swiftly...
It's like yesterday,
Where everyone I treasured still there,
In my eye... In my memory... In the eternal...

The more in my mind,
The day might come...
for all of us and no one are spared from it.
Sometimes, I think of it..
When will I be there with them?
or Are they still here with me?

Heart's aching,
and all I want is silence..

One said,
The more you want to see someone,
The more you won't be able to see.

Thinking of wonder,
and wonder what is it...
Where is it,
how is it?
who will be there
and how can I reach there?
Everything still in vain.
No one know the answer..
But I will find it out, sometimes, someday, somehow..

人老了，心也累了。
明天，又是如何的一天？
每天，只期待。。。那一点点的安宁时刻。

只想，就那样的离开。。这里。
有时，我在怀疑，我自己还是自己？
有时，我在怀疑，我到底在哪里？现实，还是梦里。
梦村，偶然是我寄托灵魂之地。
因为那里能找回自我。

我只是个平凡人。。。
人生能过的轰轰烈烈，
但我选择了它，平凡。
每个人都拥有它。。
但有几个人会珍惜它？

他走了。。
她也随您离开。
留下的，就只有我。
在梦里，就是我们的天地。
但你们都没来看我。

累了。。想睡了。。

wanna go casinos? sentosa casino? genting highland? manila casino? think twice

Resorts World (RW) have 3 casinos in South East Asia. Please be reminded that you will lose big time as the location of the casinos have hidden meaning.

Genting Highland - 肯定害人 - Ever wonder why every year there's fatal accident there?
Sentosa - 胜到傻 - They win until they go mad, how you going to win?
Manila - Money拉 - They pull your money away, why want to go there?

It's mr Toad, saying that he's too lonely
How I wish that,
he could said
something that i know
and understand.

it's the life that he had gone through.
hardship of life.

I see the world.
rich and poor
young and old.

and everyone still live on.
with only what they have
and what they had

it's just like nothing,
for one who said
nothing to get.

something is nothing
and
nothing is something

when you know that everything
is opposing you
and dont be sad

because it's what you're thinking
and listen to your heart.
what your heart is thinking
and feeling

can we fly?
in dream
or where ever we could

some of them,
tried it before reaching the earth,
from a high building.

is that how they say
gooodbye
to their heart.
and there goes ..
everything

leave over
nothing but
sadness
for the one love them.

last moment

There she goes

She was one important lady in my life
who makes my day,
different from other child.
Where I have my own gang of candy chewer.

Our memories start in a wonderful manner.
life seems so simple...
both of us get together.
it's the destiny we ripe within some year.
and we met again,
in this fanciful here.

It's here we met,
with the family we came.
when i were young, i dont know anything,
but know this nickname of yours.
which started which a "G"
and ended with a "R"

You're the one who give me courage
and power
to live

so much to live on and so much to say
that so much to talk of
and never ending fate.

how much we had been together
and how long had we stayed
and how others treating you
and you could say...

I dont know what's happening in between
you and them...
but from what I see now
it's just not fair

the unfairness
and the ill-treatment
of theirs
to you.

it's just, not what we're doing.
when you're sick,
there are not there.
even they do,
it's just so the sack of...
acting out
that they care,
but heck,
they dont...

What had happened actually?
Can i know?
can i know why they are like that?
i really wished to know...

your face's like a buddha,
whenever i see you,
my heart's calm,
and even you're nothing me anything
I know you care
for who i'm
and who you're.

I love your smile,
it's the purest,
from deep of your heart.

but why they dont care?
why they dont even bother to see you?
when they're here,
why when i always wanted to see you,
you're not there anymore.
going to see your beloved husband,
on the air.

some of them,
were so eager to wake you up in the morning,
when you will never wake up
forever again?

why wouldn't they wake you up,
when you're still able to?

They buy cars, house, and all sorts of interesting items
they give you money, gold and everything!!!
and send it to you with flames...
and you receive it in dust and ashes.

Why wouldn't they did all that,
when you're able to enjoy it?
when you're stay in it?
but to let you have all of it,
somewhere in the middle of the sky?
WHY?!

Life's a joke,
you had this funny little fellow who
come to claim your body as theirs.
and you fall to them.

and started to reclaim your body.
after a bloody fight.
but ended being hurt.

You can only sustain your body
with milk...
through a tiny little plastic tube
from the air...
through your nose, to your body...
it's very sick for me...
to feel your pain...

my heart is sore.
and realize that life is so tiny and weak

how ironic that they,
still don't want to see you.
and this kind of attitude,
is so disgusting.

May this kind of fate cursed upon you..and you and you and you...
for being so mean to her.

and now,
she's going to somewhere
that she's belong,
to continue her life
with her beloved, who leave her
18 years ago
when i was 5.

I wish you could open your eye to look at me
I wish you could talk to me
but seems like it won't happened.
it's ok, at least i know that you're still with me.

Good bye "G"rand Mother"R"
I love you so...

Who are they?
for one who they might be.

For the soul which being torment,
by the other soul,
of power, and desire.

humans are humans,
we born in equal.
No on shall be God,
then the one who you're in - The inner you.

Why they have power,
and instill fear upon others.

Why they have wealth,
and again instill fear upon others.

Again, Humans we're...
shall work for what we deserve,
and when we get what we deserved.

Do not use them against what moral had stated.

Educator and Meditator(monk)
both are teachers.

sometimes Im wonder,
who will live better?

both must have noble character.
and educate to be better,
the mission is simple,
just to educate the world.

both treated with respect,
but seems it's gonna be a fact.
Educator seems lousier,
than almighty Meditator.

we serve as the son of God,
to fulfill the desire of knowledge to others.
yet the treatment is differ.

Educator got scolded and cursed by the one he/she taught.
Meditator got respected and blessed by the one he/she taught.

life it's,
and this is the way i choose..
it might be so wrong ,'
and seems impossible ...
at least, it's not wrong.
and this is my way of life,
and how I was taught...
and who im..
be gone.

again we as human,
we're powerless to control some situation.

For those who does,
it can't be more than 99% of total control.
Unless, you're God.
Does God have 100% control against all?
In doubt now...

for trust,
we had in each other,
in the human world of civilization.

The strong structure of being together,
could be easily ripped off by single tiny object.
A gigantic building,
could easily fall apart,
ripped by a single brick that support the building.
and all the hard work,
gone by gone.

no.. no more..
for the broken object,
would never be perfect,
after a little crack or ripped off.
it might be repaired, but it will have scar there.
not for once, but for the rest of the building.

word,
is an instrument that could makes communication between humans.
without knowing that,
words,
can be as sweet as a candy,
nor
as lethal as a poison.

what a wonderful world...
with the reality that,
it's connected to hell.
which related to the Chinese Yin Yang.

Sometimes,
the more dangerous something is,
supposely it will be harmful to us.
but,
sometimes it doesnt.
Funny but true.

Stress could be dangerous if too much of it.
but it does the magic to do something,
and it became something good.

so dangerous doesnt mean it's bad ...

and

nothing is good...
money is good if you have it.
but you will never be good,
when you have too much of it.
as things might happened to you,
as you have too much of it.

life it's...
this is my way of life.
well, it's time for me to change...
yet, it's still my life...
with both hell and heaven,
I endure in this way.

no one I could,
change or being sway.
that's the truth of life.